Are you ready for 2019?

Happy-New-Year-20161

In less than four hours the magical midnight hour will arrive and I will welcome a new year with open arms. Are you as eager for the New Year as I am?

To say I have been quiet this year is an understatement. Of course, there are reasons for it. In the past I have tried to be open and honest with you all about my depression, as well as my other medical problems, and how it has affected my writing and/or personal life. Despite my openness about those issues, I kept some details to myself.

“Why?”, some of you might wonder.

The answer is simple… and equally complicated. At least for me it is.

I had loads of uncertainty about telling every one the exact details of my actual diagnosis. There was even some fear that some people might abandon me due to the stigma that sometimes come with mental health issues.

However, I have reached a point in both my personal life, and my writing career, that I have decided to push past the fear and uncertainty to be more honest about my condition. Not that I feel obligated to let you all know everything that’s going on in my personal life, because, and please don’t take this personally, I don’t feel obligated at all. We’re all allowed to have a personal life, right?

That being said, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to tell my readers the whole of it so that perhaps some of my past actions (or inaction) might make more sense. Perhaps if you all knew what I went through on a daily basis you might understand why I am the way I am. So, here it goes.

I am BiPolar II.

There, I said it and the world didn’t implode. I also took a quick peek out the window closest to me and made sure there were no flying monkeys or other general, scary signs of impending apocalypse. Yippee!

For those of you who don’t know what BiPolar II is, here’s the definition from the National Institute of Mental Health’s website:

“Bipolar disorder, also known as manic-depressive illness, is a brain disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood, energy, activity levels, and the ability to carry out day-to-day tasks. There are four basic types of bipolar disorder; all of them involve clear changes in mood, energy, and activity levels. These moods range from periods of extremely “up,” elated, and energized behavior (known as manic episodes) to very sad, “down,” or hopeless periods (known as depressive episodes).”

So, in essence, I go through periods of depression AND periods of mania. Depression most people get. Mania, well, have you ever seen that Vraylar commercial with the lady and the post-it notes? If no, you can check it out by clicking here. It’s not an official YouTube upload by the pharmaceutical company, so I’m not sure how long it’ll be up, but it’s the perfect example with how my brain works when I’m manic. In essence, my mind races with all these thoughts and ideas until I go overboard. I’ll start four different books, decide to spring clean my house, and take on additional outside projects all at once. So many tasks that if I were in my right mind I would absolutely know I have no time or energy for. My mania makes me feel like I’m Super Girl – I can do it all.

Until I crash and I realize I really can’t.

It gets worse, I don’t just crash, I go into a deep depression a lot of times. The sort of depression that requires a good bit of medication that will help me do the simplest of tasks, like getting out of bed… or even worse, not hurting myself.

Okay, so here’s the point where you might wonder “Why is she telling me all of this now?”

My reasons are two-fold:

  1. I wanted to let you know that I get that in a lot of ways I’ve let you down with not writing certain books that you want.

For instance, Alec’s book in the Big Bad Bite Series or Declan & Teagan’s book in the Ex Ops Series. I reached points of mania, started too many projects (including these), crashed from the mania into depression, and then lost momentum and interest in those stories. It also means I have several book ideas that I have started that you guys have never even heard of! One day, I hope to bring ALL of these stories to life for you. Trust me when I say – I really do WANT to write them. I just need to be in the right head-space to do it.

Add in the fact that I had several (some almost life threatening) reactions to medications I was put on for my BiPolar II in the past few years, I hope you can understand why I have been sort of all over the place personally and professionally. Some of the medications made me spiral into the worst depression I have ever experienced. There were honestly days I didn’t think I was going to make it. I lost hope, I gained about a hundred pounds, and even worse, I lost myself.

Thank God I have an amazing family and wonderful friends in my life! They kept me going when I didn’t want to. They loved me through it all, even when I couldn’t love myself. I also had many readers who messaged me, emailed me, and sent me notes in the mail telling me how much my books meant to them. I can’t thank any of them enough. Not my family, my friends or those readers. Know that I love you all immensely and I am beyond grateful for your love and words. You literally saved my life.

Moving on…

       2. If being honest about my situation helps anyone else out there struggling with BiPolar II, then that’s just proof that in my own way I’m kicking BiPolar’s ass.

I have long admired Demi Lovato for being open and honest about her BiPolar Disorder. She’s been a strength for me when I had no strength for myself. Even through her trials and tribulations, she’s been a strong advocate for mental health. Watching her struggle this year was hard, but also eye opening for me. It made me realize that I had to fear my diagnosis less, and try to understand it more.

To wrap things up (I honestly didn’t mean to write a short book to tell you all of this), going into 2019 I have two main goals.

First, work on my health. That includes managing my BiPolar II and working on my weight for health reasons. I had a scare with possible Congestive Heart Failure this past year, and I’ll be honest with you, I wasn’t able to afford all the tests. For now I’m going on faith that because my EKG was normal that I’m fine at the moment. My goal is to lose the weight, improve my health, and if I have any more symptoms find a way to afford those tests.

Secondly, I’m going to get back to writing. I have not published a book in over a year now. My writing muses are finally speaking to me, and instead of trying to “force” myself to write a story I know you want, I’m going to follow my muse.

I am also going to challenge myself. I am doing this by allowing my muse to lead me to this new series with new characters for you, but also to make a commitment to you to start AND finish this three book series in 2019. In 2020 I hope to return to Ex Ops and Big Bad Bite and give you the stories you’ve been waiting for.

Please be patient with me.

Please don’t give up on me.

Please trust that I am going to bust my ass to bring you an unforgettable story for 2019.

And above all, know that you, the reader, matter to me. We’re a book family, and I like to think that even though I am equivalent to the nutty Aunt that you never know what she’s going to do, you still know she’s doing her best just for you.

Let’s go froth and kick 2019’s ass my friends!

Happy New Years!

Love,

Jessie Lane

P.S. If you want to stay on top of my new releases in 2019 I highly recommend you sign up for my newsletter HERE (don’t forget to add my email address to your contacts so the email doesn’t go to spam) and join my Facebook reader group “Jessie’s Jewels“. I do exclusive giveaways for the group you totally don’t want to miss. 😏

P.S.S. My “unofficial” New Year’s Resolutions are below. Although I super doubt I’ll achieve that last one, lol. 

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December Appearances in Kentucky!

*drumroll* SURPRISE! I’ve decided to do two local last minute appearances this year!!! So if you’re anywhere near these events I would love to see you! There will be tons of vendors for you to do some Christmas shopping around me at both events. I HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE! 😍
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1200 Old Ekron Rd.
Brandenburg, KY 40108
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❆12/8/18❆

Down Home Holiday Shop in Muldraugh, KY
9AM – 4PM
202 Wendell Street
Muldraugh, KY 40155

As of this moment I do not plan to do any signings in 2019. So come out and see me while you can – before I go into hibernation for 2019. *winks*

❤ Jessie Lane


Two super mega awesome Giveaways!!!

Two lucky readers are going to win a shit ton of super cool stuff! 😀
Contemporary Giveaway Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/e9a8cb3f25/?
Paranormal Giveaway Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/e9a8cb3f26/?
Go forth and enter!!! Feel free to share about them too!

Thankful for Readers Giveaway Banner Contemporary 3Thankful for Readers Giveaway Banner Paranormal


Today is World Suicide Prevention Day

National-suicide-prevention-week-2014Today is World Suicide Prevention Day.

As someone who suffers from serious mental health issues, I want to be the first to say: YOU MATTER. No one else can play your part! There are an estimated 800,000 deaths every year to this mental health epidemic and I think the world is ready to make the changes necessary to help those who need it.

If you have thoughts of suicide, confidential help is available for free at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Call 1-800-273-8255. The line is available 24 hours, every day.

NEWSWEEK has a great article on suicide rates, world-wide statistics and help if you would like to check it out.
https://www.newsweek.com/world-suicide-prevention-day-15th-annual-event-illustrates-importance-mental-1113494


The Disappearance of Crystal Rogers & why you should watch it.

LENGTHY POST AHEAD. I just finished watching The Disappearance of Crystal Rogers with my husband. We watch a lot of crime shows due to his background in Law Enforcement, Firefighting and being a 911 Dispatcher, but in a couple of ways, you could say this one hit home to me. One, I live a hop, skip and a jump from Bardstown, KY where the mother of five lived and went missing from. I’ve been to that town. Walked the streets and admired how gorgeous it was. I even have a favorite restaurant there. Crime may happen everywhere, but when something of this magnitude happens in your relative backyard, it makes the hair stand up on the back of your neck.
 
Two, it’s surreal when you’re watching a true crime documentary with your husband, who happens to be the Director of a 911 Dispatch Center near Bardstown, and he keeps saying “I’ve met that Kentucky State Police Officer”, “I know where that location is” (said several times over), and he can name all three Dispatchers that were used for the call clips in the next to last episode (or maybe it was the last episode).
 
Three, this case is so much bigger than the disappearance of Crystal Rogers and the documentary series that Oxygen did proved that in a lot of ways I think. This is also about the assassination of a Bardstown Police Officer, Jason Ellis, the horrific double-homicide of 48-year-old Kathy Netherland and her 16-year-old daughter, Samantha, and last but never least, the assassination of Tommy Ballard, the father of Crystal Rogers who was searching tirelessly for his daughter. All of these crimes taking place in the span of four years.
 
My overall opinion after watching this show? There’s some shady things happening in Bardstown, KY. I feel for all of the families affected by these crimes and the community that is obviously scared and paranoid about what’s happening. I know what it’s like to lose a family member violently. My older brother was murdered almost six years ago, leaving behind three children. But my family was blessed to have closure in the sense that we were able to bury him and prosecute the two men who were arrested for his murder. And maybe I’m just overly sensitive right now because my husband’s 28-year-old nephew is currently missing, disappearing from North Carolina and last seen on August 3rd, 2018. His entire family is scared and desperate to find Chris Brown. So watching Crystal Roger’s family desperately still trying to find her scares me for what could possibly be going on with Chris’ situation.
 
Long story short, if you haven’t watched this show… DO IT NOW. It was a very well done story on the unsolved cases in Bardstown, KY. I pray all those families have answers and closures soon. I pray Bardstown gets closure and the chance to heal. I pray the people that are behind these crimes and responsible for so much pain and suffering are caught and prosecuted so that they never see the light of day again.
 
And perhaps most importantly, a couple of final closing notes.
 
Be aware of what’s happening in your community. Take a moment to care, because you never know, it could be your family who is the next victim of whatever heinous crime.
 
Hold your loved ones tight. You never know how long you’ll have them in your life. My niece and two nephews would give ANYTHING to have one more minute with their Dad. My Brother and Sister-in-Law will do anything and everything they have to do to find their son Chris.
 
Lastly, spread the word about this documentary. Spread the word about these crimes. Someone, somewhere out there knows something and all it takes is one critical clue or piece of evidence to bring one, if not all, of these cases to closure.
 
You can watch The Disappearance of Crystal Rogers by buying the whole season on Amazon. The link is listed below.

Reading my 1st Mystery/Thriller Book for my Nana.

I’m about to dive into my first Mystery/Thriller that is not a Romance book. I’ve always wanted to read one, but couldn’t bring myself to do it until now. I bet that sounds strange, so let me explain. My Nana loved Mystery/Thrillers. Many of my favorite memories of her, she had a book in her hand. While we were at the beach or just spending time together at her home, the two of us reading.

Personally, I started out reading Epic Fantasy, worked my way to YA Fantasy Romance, which eventually led me to Paranormal Romance & Urban Fantasy and finally Contemporary Romance. Since I lost Nana five years ago, I couldn’t see a Mystery/Thriller book without thinking of her… and hurting. Deep, down to the bottom of my soul hurting.

Seeing the names Dean Koontz, David Baldacci, James Patterson or Lisa Jackson makes me want to cry still. Which can be awkward because they’re sort of everywhere, you know? Especially James Patterson. Good Lord but that man is EVERYWHERE, lol. But after losing Nana, I wanted to read a genre I’ve never really wanted to read before – just to feel closer to her again. So, after five years I’m ready. My eyes are watery while writing this, my throat feels like it’s closing and my chest is starting to feel tight, but I’m going to take that step.

I bought my first two books: The Last Child & The Hush by John Hart. I already know I want to try some Harlan Coben after those because I adored his Netflix shows. Wish me luck everyone. And for all of you who still have your grandparents in their lives, give them a hug for me please. Because I would do ANYTHING, and I do mean anything, to have one more day with my two grandmothers. They were simply the best women in the world.

❤ Jessie

 


Do you receive the Jessie Lane Newsletter? PLEASE READ for important update!

Hi there! *waves*

On May 25th, 2018, the United Kingdom passed the GDPR (General Data Protection Regulation). This law was passed to protect certain rights and/or privacies of the citizens there. To make sure that my Jessie Lane Newsletter was GDPR compliant, on May 24th, 2018 I sent out a newsletter to my current subscribers, asking them to “re-subscribe” to a new, GDPR compliant, newsletter. If you were a newsletter subscriber at the time, and did not respond, or receive, that email for some reason, you were unsubscribed from my Jessie Lane Newsletter and will no longer receive them. If you would like to receive newsletters from me again, you will have to sign up for my newsletter again. Sorry to be a pain in the booty, but I just wanted to make sure that I was obeying all the laws and protecting everyone’s privacy to the best of my ability.

I won’t lie, I fear many of you DID NOT get that re-subscription newsletter because approximately 3,000 subscribers were lost. <- Holy guacamole y’all!

You can sign up for my Jessie Lane Newsletter by clicking HERE.

And if you have any questions at all, please feel free to contact me and ask!

P.S. I STARTED A NEW BOOK! And NO, I will not tell you what or who it is about yet because I’m a tease like that. But I will say I’m super excited about this project since it’s one I’ve wanted to work on for a very long time. 😉