Hey… you… let’s get up close and personal.
Not like that you perv! But I like the way you think. 😉
No, I want to take a moment to get a little mushy with all of you. 2015 was a really rough year for me. Seriously, the WORST year I’ve EVER had for depression. There were honestly days I didn’t think I was going to make it. There was a handful of things that kept me from stepping into that perpetual black-hole of no return though.
1. The love of my Grizzly, Minions and family.
2. The support of my friends who were there for me every step of the way, urging me to hold on, take that next step to get help, and giving me lots of love from long distance (you know who you are).
3. My faith in God. Even in my darkest moments I never doubted him, just myself. I’m working on that.
4. YOU. That’s right, YOU. Every single one of you who sent me messages and understood when I said that I had delayed a book (for the millionth time). You sent me loads of love and support. You gave me happy tears to combat the sad ones. You sent me so much love that there were days I swore I could actually feel the hugs and love you were sending me surround me in a cocoon of warm mushiness!
I can’t say thank you enough for all of your love and understanding. You’ll never know exactly how much that meant to me. With my diagnosis, I’m not cured, nor will I ever be. Depression isn’t something that you just “fix”. It’s a life long thing that I have to learn to live with. But I’m getting there, slowly but surely.
That being said, it’s obvious to say I’m still getting back on track writing wise. As of the end of this month, I’ll have not published a book in a year. Which is really scary. I’m nervous about what you all will think of Sweet Agony once I release it. Seriously scared that I’ll have failed to convey their beautiful, but heartbreaking, story into the words that give it justice. So I’ve been procrastinating.
BAD JESSIE!
I know, I know.
But it is almost done. I don’t know if I’ll get it out before Christmas, but definitely in January then. Good birthday present for myself, eh? That being said, I’m asking that you keep being patient (as you wonderfully have been) just a little while longer.
IT’S COMING. I PROMISE.
In the mean time, I just wanted to say thank you for your love and support that got me through this year. Every single one of you mean the world to me.
Until then, I want to share my new personal anthem. I love Halestorm, but this song… it’s just me. In so many ways, while I’m getting back on my feet and re-learning myself all over again. It gives me hope and the courage to take on the world. Not to mention Lzzy Hale is just all kinds of bad-ass. So I hope you love it too.
And for those of you who also suffer from depression –
HOLD ON MY FRIEND. There is a silver lining to that cloud. You are not alone. And your story is definitely not over.
Love Always,
Jessie Lane
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